Food for Thought
4:30 am
Wed February 29, 2012

Exciting news for cracker snackers

No, not  about Cracker the p(t)et pterodactyl in Captain Underpants. He'd snack on you. Nor do I refer to the Hamadryas  genus of brush-footed butterflies commonly called The Cracker. This is about the kind of crackers you eat. And eat. And eat.

I'm not much for the fancy crackers Leson goes for. In fact in this  Food for Thought I mention Cheez-its as my favorite, but now that I think about it that's not really true, either.   

My favorite would probably be buttered saltines. Give me a bottle of seltzer for hydration and I  go straight through a whole  sleeve. Butter 'em up, crunch 'em down. Rinse and repeat. Not that I do. Well, not often, anyway. And speaking of saltines ...

Fun with saltines

Here's an old prop bet you can still get suckers to fall for. Wager they can't swallow six saltines in one minute without drinking.  Sound easy?  Give it a try.  Then get someone else to put their money down.  Profit.

Saltines in cooking

As Nance mentions, saltines make a great fried chicken coating. I used to like bread crumbs for binder in meat loaf but now I find that I prefer the texture crushed saltines give. And I simply must have saltines on the side with gumbo or chili. But wait – there's more!

Miracle saltine hair restorer

It's called "Chelt"  and it's spearmint and saltines. Eat some  before breakfast every day to bring back a magnificent growth of luxuriant hair. Hey, just because it didn't work for me ...

"My daughter made me a Jerry Springer watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants and a T-shirt with two fat women fighting over a skinny guy."

– Roseanne Barr

Food for Thought” is a weekly KPLU feature covering the world of food as well as the thinking that goes into it. The feature is published here and airs on KPLU 88.5 every Wednesday during Morning Edition and All Things Considered.